Dear Government: GET OUT OF THE BEDROOM

I'm going to take on this topic, knowing full well I'll probably get a lot of offensive comments that will have to go in the trash.

Not wanting to say anything too heavy. But. I would like to hear some scientific input about the gays.... [some stuff asking about why gay men like anal sex] Is this a biological mechanism for population control ?

-- Anonymous commenter

I've chosen to censor some of Anonymous' comment that was more explicit - and distractingly so - in favor of discussing the main point:

I guess I can see how a straight man might not be able to relate to being the catcher in a game of anal sex. I for one haven't tried it and I suspect it would be painful the first few times- much like more 'traditional' intercourse between a man and a woman. But that's why God invented Astroglide, am I right ladies? (Anonymous commenter apparently isn't aware of the whole industry devoted to commercial lubricants.)

Um, since when are we talking about legalizing gay sex? There are already incredibly outdated, offensive laws against gay sex in some states. Obviously those states shouldn't legalize gay marriage without fixing those laws first.

Actually, I just thought of something. What if legalizing gay marriage made it easier for the gay-bashers to find your address and show up at your house? Would all the newly-married gays wake up to burning crosses on their lawns?

...

I find it interesting, sociologically speaking, that some straight men freak out at the idea of gay men having sex on a regular basis.

As if the presence of gay male sex, and god forbid, giving everyone equal rights, would somehow equate with a risk to straight men of ending up on the women's side of things-?!

What could be scarier, I have to ask, than being treated like a woman in today's society?

Being treated the way we treat gays.

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Is being gay a more evolved way of life and a mechanism for population control?

Yes, I've definitely thought so.

Is it genetic?

I think so. I think there are pretty good data, especially from studies of Drosophila genetics, that it is caused by biological mechanism, that it is not a choice. Furthermore, since this entire debate began, there is evidence from almost every sexual organism that homosexual pairings occur throughout nature in most species.

Does any of that matter for this debate?

I don't think the issue of being gay is the problem here. Amazingly, the conservatives seem to have learned not to make an issue out of that this time around.

No, I think equal rights, and separation of church and state, are at issue here.

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What I don't understand is, why straight people in this country are so goddamned insecure about their marriages. As John Stewart put it nicely last night on the Daily Show, "It's not like 50% of marriages end in gayness."

So where's the threat?

Stewart's guest last night was particularly offensive, saying that gays only deserve to be parts of families in the roles of sons and daughters, not as partners in marriages or having children of their own. Then he went on to make the so-called 'slippery slope' argument about how legalizing gay marriage will lead to legalizing polygamy.

I find these arguments really interesting since it's absolutely not the way I think. To me, gay relationships are the most egalitarian of all, while polygamy is the least egalitarian.

I think there should be age limits on marriage, and no one should have to get married against their will. Other than that, why do we have to make laws about it?

Because, they say, it's so important. And the catchphrase they've been using is "the most important human institution"

Is there really such a thing? Do we really need to be institutionalized in every aspect of our lives?

This sounds like typical Republican framing to me.

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I'm really frightened that, as someone aptly put it on tv today, we have almost 50 ELECTED BIGOTS who voted for a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage today.

My own home state is going to be among those putting the issue on the ballot this fall. In the past, they've passed things like banning books.

Banning books. Banning marriages. Just think on that for a while. Then think about how we supposedly stand for freedom, and what year it is.

Welcome to 2006. Are things getting better, or are they getting worse?