Science loves me.
Well, my PI might not love me. My coworkers might not love me.
They can ignore me and hate my guts. That's fine.
Because my experiments love me.
Today, the things that didn't work before, finally worked.
It only took a few tries...
In truth, it's not that exciting. It's not a huge result (not groundbreaking!). But it's a step in the right direction.
And now I get to Analyze.
My experiments don't really care.
But in some ways, that's the best thing I could ask for: not being judged.
One of the things I always loved about science is that, with few exceptions, I can do it even when I'm upset, no matter what the weather outside, no matter what I'm wearing.
I don't have to be nice to my experiments to get them to work.
If they're going to work, they're going to work. If they don't work, I can't take it personally. It wouldn't make any sense. I just have to try again.
But when they work, I'm tempted to continue seeing Science, even if it is an abusive spouse.
And when strangers are willing to send me things I need, just because they're published and I asked nicely, I think Science loves me!.
I think, wow, not all scientists suck.
I mean, I knew that. It's just that most of the ones I have to work with on a regular basis resent that I want them to give a shit about doing their jobs.
They never will.
And it does seem like, whenever I think seriously about leaving, Science starts trying to make it up to me.
Damn you, Science. You and Trouble* might have to fight it out.
*Trouble loves me (and Morrissey), too.